iT hurtS

As a little kid, I grew up not like what other kids. I never had a dream to be what I want to be. As somebody asked me about what my dream was, I would prefer to keep silence, I just did want to think about that. I never knew what the dream was.  As I grew up with lots of stuff going on, I started to think about my life. Not ego, but it is more to find my hidden potential that I need to be popped up to find my real life.

Getting education, started out from kindergarten, until getting master in US, and all the things I have done, It drag me down to find who really I am. In fact, once I was an attempt to be an individual that was not me, that was really hurt. I could not be others who are going to be me. Their lives are their paradises, and my life is my world. Still, I could not find who really I am, where I want to go, and what I want to do.

I am still searching out my identity. My life is really fragile and vulnerable. I know I need to be what I want to be. I am still using to others’ consideration of life to my identity. I am still using other opinions to find out my identity as if my life was bond with them. I am still thinking to be others not me. I am still using my wealth as a standard of happy life.

It hurts…

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